Chapters13 & 14

These chapters, yet again, not only interested me but also made me reflect on some of my own clients and their experiences with trauma. The Body Keeps the Score has been a great resource for me as I work to understand my client's trauma's through the behavior interactions. I tend to highlight things that stick out to me when I read, and these two chapters were full of yellow underlines and circled words. There are so many things I feel like I could write about in this blog, but I will start with appreciating Van Der Kolk's introductory statement - "nobody can treat a war, or abuse, rape, molestation, or any other horrendous event, for that matter; what has happened a not be undone. But what can be dealt with are the imprints of the trauma on body, mind, and soul..." (p. 206). While this statement might be obvious, it was also a gentle reminder that my role as a case manager and eventual therapist is not to fix the problem. However, my role is to help those reestablish ownership of their own body and mind by a variety of different methods that may differ from client to client. 

I enjoyed reading about the limbic system and the parts of the brain - the emotional brain and the rational brain. I will admit that when it comes to neuroscience, I can often become overwhelmed and yet fascinated by what I am reading at the same time. Van Der Kolk describes and as we have learned previous is that our brains can become disorganized and our overall functioning can become disrupted. While the brain is most certainly interesting, I also found it interesting that yoga can help reduced PTSD symptoms (p. 209). While I am not a yoga instructor, I do wonder if simple poses like downward dog or child's pose could be helpful in meeting with some of my current clients - a name that comes to mind is Kate. Kate and I already regularly work on deep breathing, but I am wondering if a mindful activity like yoga might be of interest to her. I was also reminded of Kate when Van Der Kolk began his discussion over relationships, he stated, " when we are terrified, nothing calms us down like the reassuring voice o the firm embrace of someone we trust" (p.212). In Kate and I's visit last week she asked me - "Mariah, if I need a break with my mom today, can I come back to your office and you give me a squeeze?" I told her absolutely and she did just that when she needed a break. She opened the door, came over to my desk, opened up her arms, and said, "squeeze please". I gave her a big hug and let her know that I was proud of her for taking an appropriate break. As I type this, I feel a sense of pride in knowing that on some level, whether I always feel it or not, I am a safe person for Kate. 

Now to switch gears, I thought the discussion on the different use of drugs was quite interesting, especially the research on MDMA. The discussion on other medications was also quite insightful as I have another client, Trevor we will call him, who recently told me how upset he was that his doctor would not prescribe him Xanax. Trevor, who is diagnosed with PTSD, came into my office upset because "my doc won't prescribe me benzos...". He went on to clarify that he truly feels like he needs Xanax to help control some of his anxiety. Van Der Kolk writes this thought that is concerning, " when people are desperate, they will do just about anything to feel calmer and more in control" (p.226). Van Der Kolk goes on to discuss that these types of drugs don't cure trauma, but only dampen the expressions of physiology. I wonder if this is something I could share with my client and if he would be receptive to this. Like Van Der Kolk states, I also did my best to explain to Trevor that these medications are highly addictive which could be a reason why his psychiatrist is so reluctant to give him these medications as well. He, again, did not like this answer. Perhaps I could share some of this chapter with him. 

In chapter 14, I found it interesting that it was discovered that when people wrote: "their deepest fears their handwriting often becomes more childlike and primitive" (p.244). This made sense to me as they might resort back to what it was like before the trauma occurred, but I want to know more about this. Knowing that I might work with trauma, I hope to have an approach similar to Van Der Kolks of 'pendulating'. I don't want to avoid confronting details and issues, but I hope to teach my clients how to safely dip their toes in the water and gently take it about again. 

I'd like to end by sharing a few quotes that I found powerful in chapter 14: 

"Traumatic events are almost impossible to put into words" (p. 233). 

"We may think we can control our grief, our terror, or our shame by remaining silent, butt naming offers the possibility of a different kind of control" (p.234). 

"Ignoring inner reality also eats away at your sense of self, identity, and purpose" (p.235). 

"Getting perspective on your terror and sharing it with others can reestablish the feelings that you are a member of the human race" (p. 236).

"Trauma stories lessen the isolation of trauma, and they provide an explanation for why people suffer the way they do" (p. 239). 

"In other words trauma makes people feel like either somebody else or like nobody. In order to overcome trauma, you need help to get in touch with your body, with your self" (p. 249).